(photo courtesy of the web: author has no intention to infringe property rights or any copyright law)
It can only stay as good as it gets.
Life can sometimes play games on you. Here I am following closely bound to someone who really can't care for me back the way I do, pathetic--yes.
I always have this tendency to like some one who can't like me back. If I later found out that this person might have some inclination to like me, it just puts me off. What am I an idiot, maybe but I sure do hope not.
Should I be sleeping on the same bed, I would love to put my hands around you and kiss the back of your neck. Should you put me off I would feel dejected and unloved. What is this stupid feeling of loving. Is it something we intentionally try to seek although knowing completely well we most of the time end up getting hurt?
Sad, but true. Or am I just closing doors for getting hurt much to often?
Well I try and try I have done, to stay positive and look at the brighter side knowing and learning from each rejection. But I think I have one to many. I most of the time think I deserve to be cynical.
A turn of phrase I waited, it rained... soon it will end. The waiting I hated as we sleep restlessly although the night with my mind wondering will it ever be better. Should I or should I not. I looked up on the face that shares the same pillow as me. Those lips I would so love to kiss, those that I would so love to love. But I dare not for friends we are better off, it makes things less complicated. Yet in the hopes to feel your warmth I cuddled you into my arms and felt the beating of your heart. And in that moment I was not alone I breathed with you...It can only stay good as it gets.
Tomorrow we are a different person. We often times tend to forget moments of closeness like last night, but I can only say this for myself. But when I rouse myself on the morning you were there awake and worried as to what the morning might bring. You are like a kid that has always been sheltered from harm not really knowing what to expect but wanting everything to fall into place. I can not baby sit you... then and there I became another person. I tried to stop myself by indulging you and caressing your back, a gentle massage of care and stolen kisses to the back of your shoulders which you hated me doing but never the less I did after all you asked me to rub your back. I deserved the feel of your back on my lips if not your lips to mine.
Sweet bitterness I know for a moment I might have fallen, but fall I can not. I know someday you'll come along. Just like the song, or is it only in songs that they really do?
It can only stay as good as it gets.
Life can sometimes play games on you. Here I am following closely bound to someone who really can't care for me back the way I do, pathetic--yes.
I always have this tendency to like some one who can't like me back. If I later found out that this person might have some inclination to like me, it just puts me off. What am I an idiot, maybe but I sure do hope not.
Should I be sleeping on the same bed, I would love to put my hands around you and kiss the back of your neck. Should you put me off I would feel dejected and unloved. What is this stupid feeling of loving. Is it something we intentionally try to seek although knowing completely well we most of the time end up getting hurt?
Sad, but true. Or am I just closing doors for getting hurt much to often?
Well I try and try I have done, to stay positive and look at the brighter side knowing and learning from each rejection. But I think I have one to many. I most of the time think I deserve to be cynical.
A turn of phrase I waited, it rained... soon it will end. The waiting I hated as we sleep restlessly although the night with my mind wondering will it ever be better. Should I or should I not. I looked up on the face that shares the same pillow as me. Those lips I would so love to kiss, those that I would so love to love. But I dare not for friends we are better off, it makes things less complicated. Yet in the hopes to feel your warmth I cuddled you into my arms and felt the beating of your heart. And in that moment I was not alone I breathed with you...It can only stay good as it gets.
Tomorrow we are a different person. We often times tend to forget moments of closeness like last night, but I can only say this for myself. But when I rouse myself on the morning you were there awake and worried as to what the morning might bring. You are like a kid that has always been sheltered from harm not really knowing what to expect but wanting everything to fall into place. I can not baby sit you... then and there I became another person. I tried to stop myself by indulging you and caressing your back, a gentle massage of care and stolen kisses to the back of your shoulders which you hated me doing but never the less I did after all you asked me to rub your back. I deserved the feel of your back on my lips if not your lips to mine.
Sweet bitterness I know for a moment I might have fallen, but fall I can not. I know someday you'll come along. Just like the song, or is it only in songs that they really do?
you know who ever you are... i know its bittersweet but it can only stay good as it gets, moments they are priceless.
ReplyDeleteThanks for commenting over at Tova's place!! Love meeting new people. Your post was very moving...can't wait to read more!!
ReplyDeleteyou know aikey(or is this supposed to be anonymous?lol) sorry about that... but seriously, some do say love can make even the most intelligent person act stupidly but that's just bec we're dealing with other people's emotion besides ours. there's no exact science in love or else life would be mush less complicated and we'd have solved one of life's biggest challenges besides world hunger. love could cloud up our judgement and could make us feel uncertain when to other people the answer to our question seems to be so crystal clear that it's already hitting us in the face but we still remain oblivious of that fact. it's just the way it is. sometimes we put ourselves up to getting hurt but they say its part of loving,although personally I prefer to do without it and just feel the sweetness of loving someone and being loved back but then you wouldn't appreciate the sweetness without knowing the bittersweet feeling of shedding a tear for the one we trully love. So it all boils down to you knowing which person deserves the tears you shed and if in turn they'll shed a tear bec of you. but then... this is just me babling and what do i know, right? I'm the quiet and boring one, haha. just kidding. I wish you all the happiness and love life could bring coz you deserve it... happy birthday!€r!n
ReplyDeletethat was sweet of you erin... you know why i became another person the morning after because i felt that perhaps it was never worth it to begin with.
ReplyDeletebasta ako, alam ko, we are the master of our selves, so don't let anything, anyone put you down. such a waste of time, wherein you on the brighter side, there's still someone that might be there, preparing to be with. why focus or dwell on someone that will not give us back at least the LEAST that we expect. you are a wonderful person and you can surpass that emotional crisis, as i may say... "tama ba 'tong pinagsasasabi ko Aik?" hehehehe basta i enjoyed reading your posts...take care and God bless!
ReplyDelete~mAkKi