Snippets and Thoughts

Ever found yourself engrossed by the whole idea that you have lost yourself in the process of thinking about someone who matters to you? Caught yourself teary eyed as you walk past places you both have shared memories and tales of persuasion?

I have.

Life is peppered with bits and pieces of memories that keeps us sane in this insane and pious world. Spiced up with memories that we can always hold on to. Moments that we play over and over again in our minds... a perpetual playback of that one kiss, that one smile, that one phone call and that split second realization that you have found that one person you were looking for all along. It maybe harsh but the truth is... we live by those moments and when people change there is nothing left to do but remember.

I did.

Did you ever think that you were alone on those moments of confusion as you are not sure how come it feels so right when it should be wrong? We all take that chance. I have read it somewhere when one asked, "Did you regret us?" "I miss a lot of things" he said. "But I never did, if I never embraced us... I'd miss you."

I was there.

I figured I needed to build my defenses once more--the one I tore down for you. I can never be needy and pathetic, I can not be naked and vulnerable. I can not let my self get lost in the process of loving nor caring. Surely, now I miss and I cant even say it straight faced. Why? That I don't know because I needed you.

I still do.

Know that in those moments of grief as you lay in bed with your eyes wide open hoping and waiting you would be remembered, you have been. Close your eyes and grab that pillow, cry if you must...

I do.

Trust that in your silence, peace would bring you hope. If they are not able to give you back that love you deserve that doesn't mean they don't care enough but maybe because they just don't know how to.

Be at peace with the love that you give and don't expect anything in return. Do not be afraid to love because you have love to give.

I will.

There maybe tomorrow or the next day after that. The rest of the tale only time can tell.

5:19
Matt Wertz